FAQs about The Humanist Ceremonies

Can I or friends and family contribute by saying something during the ceremony?

Yes of course. Such occasions are all the better for personal involvement, but likewise, should you not wish to speak, then I’m there to do it for you!

Can we include poetry or music?

Yes, these always add another layer of meaning and can be really moving. I have my own collection of poems and readings for both weddings and baby naming ceremonies and these are available for couples should they need them, but should you or a family member or friend wish to contribute with your own poetry sourced from elsewhere, then that’s fine too. Some talented individuals even write poems for the occasion themselves!

In a similar way, music is another way of adding a personal touch to the ceremony. Recorded music and live music both have their qualities and if you have any friends who can play or sing, then that is really special. I have had all kinds of musical instruments played at such occasions… jazz, string quartets, guitar, harp, but less conventionally, drums, mouth organs, maracas and even a didgeridoo!

Where can ceremonies take place?

Humanist ceremonies can take place anywhere, presuming you have had permission from the owners. Many people of course hire a venue or use a function room in a hotel or country house. I have though also conducted ceremonies in very many private homes and gardens, as well as more unusual places… on a hill top, in an orchard, vineyard, bluebell wood, on boats and by the sea.

Some choose to have their humanist ceremony outside in a place which has happy memories or special meaning for them. Others have even found a field where the ceremony can take place outside or in a marquee and where their guests can also camp, or they may perhaps hire a whole house, a theme park or children’s farm for the occasion. Memorably, one ceremony even took place in a Bingo Hall!

I would be pleased to supply a list of venues where I have conducted ceremonies in the past if you are still at the stage of looking for somewhere to hold your celebration.

Do we have to follow tradition?

No not at all, though a good deal of marrying couples like to have a bit of tradition so that the ceremony is recognised as being a wedding. We can of course, tweak or adjust some of these traditional elements to reflect today’s society.

If you have an unconventional idea in mind … just run it past me!

Do you have to be non-religious to have a humanist ceremony?

No. You do not have to call yourself a ‘humanist’ to use a humanist celebrant, but simply prefer a non-religious ceremony.

Can religion come into the ceremony at all?

Well, the logic is that as soon as religion is introduced, then the occasion ceases to be non-religious. However, occasionally cultural elements are included to represent the differing backgrounds of those taking part or attending and these can be wonderfully rich and colourful. It’s very much something to be discussed – do please feel you can phone or email me to ask any such kind of question.

How much does such a personal service cost?

My fees are within national guidelines recommended by the British Humanist Association. These kinds of ceremonies are probably much less than you might envisage, but of course I have to take into account travel costs and such like. Personally written for each scenario, each ceremony involves a good deal of research, writing and editing. Also I would recommend having a rehearsal for wedding ceremonies, so all of this is taken into account when setting fees.

Does one have to have a rehearsal?

No - if the ceremony is very simple. However, I strongly recommend having a rehearsal as it allows one to uncover any practical considerations that may present themselves and also I believe a rehearsal helps couples to enjoy their wedding ceremony even more.

The wedding rehearsal is not really though to rehearse the wording for the occasion, but much more the ‘actions’ – entrances, exits, where we stand etc. They certainly can ‘iron out’ any little hiccups that might occur, without making the occasion too slick or glossy.

Do we have to dress up really smartly?

Not if you don’t want to! Baby naming ceremonies in particular can be very informal, especially if they take place in the garden in the summer months. Let me know though what you propose, as I wouldn’t want to be dressed ‘to the nines’ if your occasion is a shorts and T-shirts affair! I would also advise that you let your guests know what your dress code is so that they don’t feel out of place or uncomfortable. Similarly, if there is a colour theme, I try to accommodate if I can, otherwise, I just wear something neutral.

Does the Celebrant wear anything ceremonial or formal to conduct ceremonies?

No, but I like to know the dress code so that I fit in. I’m not drab, but I try not to wear anything too bright, after all I am not the main focus of attention, merely the deliverer of the sentiments you wish to be expressed!

Are Humanist ceremonies dignified and acceptable to everyone?

Yes. Each ceremony is individually written in a sensitive and caring way and is well received by everyone. People with religious beliefs find humanist ceremonies to be entirely acceptable and not in the least offensive. Humanists themselves are not against religion in any way, rather they aim to be inclusive of everyone, whatever their beliefs. It’s in fact often those with a religious faith who comment that they really liked the ceremony and found it to be appropriate for those involved.

Are you trained to do this kind of work?

Yes. I am part of a network of humanist celebrants trained and accredited by the British Humanist Association. Humanist Ceremonies™ offers non-religious ceremonies throughout England and Wales. In Scotland, these ceremonies are offered by the Humanist Society of Scotland.

Humanist Celebrants write and conduct naming, wedding or partnership ceremonies, as well as funeral and memorial ceremonies. Each occasion is unique, appropriate, and personal. The BHA’s network of skilled celebrants come from all walks of life and have integrity, sensitivity and experience of life’s ebbs and tides. Their ceremonies reflect their personal qualities and the excellence of their training.

Humanist Ceremonies™ is part of the British Humanist Association 1 Gower Street, London, WC1E 6HD

What is Humanism?

Humanism is the belief that we can live good lives without religious or superstitious beliefs. Humanists make sense of the world using reason, experience and shared human values. They seek to make the best of the one life we have by creating meaning and purpose for themselves. Humanists take responsibility for their actions and work with others for the common good.

Humanism is a positive stance. Humanists gain inspiration from art and culture, and a rich natural world. They believe that we have only one life and that it’s our responsibility to make it a good life, and to live it to the full!